I wanted to talk to my grandmother about this, moving away from our own family context. She believed strongly that the family is the central unit of social control, with the parents as strong disciplinarians who teach their children social norms and enforce those norms. I made the point that while many people believe this view is true, there are a lot of examples of people who grow up in non-traditional households that turn out not to be delinquents. I turned out fine, and many of my friends who grew up in non-traditional families were able to find their social norms from other sources. I think the family does play an important role, but it is not necessary to have a traditional family in order to instill values. My grandmother respectfully disagreed.
We talked a little bit about how family contributes to one's success as an adult. We both agreed that having a strong family environment that encourages learning and overcoming obstacles is something that contributes to success later in life. I see this in my own experience, and my grandmother herself was quite well educated, something she contributes to her happiness and the success that she has had. She made the point that when families leave it to the schools to teach their children everything, this is when children are at risk for delinquency and failure as adults. The research I found agrees, that stimulation at an early age fosters learning, self-esteem and ability that lasts throughout life (Crosnoe, et al., 2010). From what I have learned, having a strong family system early in life allows for more time spent with children and they can gain more from the family at this early age. My grandmother certainly agreed with this. She used it to make a case for mothers staying at home, though I argued that it was not necessary to do so, I do in general agree that the more time we spend with children the better off they will be.
The last thing we talked about was how family shapes one's future interactions in social groups. She did not have strong opinions about this subject, but that everything a child learns early in life...
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